MAN

The silver linings that I once hold onto had turned its back from me. The life that I live as of now is the life that I am not sure of. I don’t want to be at certain places, situations or moments. The feeling of uneasiness that engulf my mind that has been living for quite some time. The impact that it leads has shown me that not everyone will be at peace. I have never ever tried to console myself in the ways Muslims do.  I did try, but I feel nothing. The emptiness that hits me like a full speed bus had me think of nothing and made me numb. The casualties that I experience were something I have never seen or felt. The love that I keep, the bits of care, the gleam of love that I kept has gone and fade away. I did try to reconcile it, but I failed because I have no other reason to keep it anymore. The heart that needs surgery has been treated yet the scars and wound could never be treated. The healings that I often take came from things that won't stay for eternity. A story of a man who often shows the independent, strong, responsible, and matured sides of him. A story of a man who hides the needy, alone, sorrow, dolor and solitude sides of him. What is there left for someone who knows what to do to be accepted by Him but neglect it. A man who keeps himself solitude from his own family and friends. A man who fakes every smile just to mask his sadness away. A who have done everything except taking other peoples' lives, yet still breathing while people who are devoted towards Him die. A man who keeps his love locked away and deep in his heart and never let anybody in. A man who wanted to hug and kiss his parents foreheads and tell them how much he loves them yet never actually did it because he feels he isn’t that much of a good son to them. A story of a man who pushes people away and always make sure they wouldn’t know of his true self. A man who enjoys companies yet never really admits.